I was watching “This morning” yesterday and Gino D’acampo was cooking with Holly and Phil. Holly was making a point of reminding Gino to say please when he asked her to chop something or put something in the pan to cook. It got me wondering about manners and how important they are to us Brits and are they as important to other cultures.
Like many people in this country I was brought up to say please and thank you all the time and manners are very important to me. When I first met Hasan and started living with him I did get annoyed with him when he didn’t say please or thank you, it just didn’t occur to him to do so. Obviously there are words in Turkish for please and thank you but I rarely heard them in the same context as we use them. Teşekkür ederim means thank you and is used to reply to someone asking about someones well being, response to a compliment, but not when being given something like a drink etc; lütfen is the word for please and I hardly ever heard that uttered in all the time I spent in Turkey.
Hasan and I used to argue about it quite often because without saying please it felt like he was just barking orders at me and I really didn’t like it. Also it really bugged me when I made him a cup of tea or gave him something and he never said thank you. It only took a short while for him to see the light and he quickly caught on that if he wanted an easy life he should remember his manners.
So after watching Gino being prompted several times by Holly on the show I’m thinking maybe it’s the same in Italian culture.
Carole Gardiner
back to life 